(Wrote this since Nov 2009… Just dusted it off... been doing that alot lately.)
"…you are everything he's not..." excerpts of a friend who had guy-problems.
The quote-in-quote INSPIRATION for this note/post. (I know I know my mind is... something else... JUST READ IT ALREADY!!)
The one important thing left out in that sentence and/or scenario is/was/is/was……… COMPATIBILITY!
That’s one thing my ‘friends’ that can’t ever be overrated.
And don’t gimme that love is blind, destiny is numb crap or fate chooses your relations but you choose your friends crap… (well… at least for now) :-)
(I am a sarcastic romantic after all aren’t I?)
The only exceptions to this rule are family, even amidst which it could still be applicable with the exception of, yours truly, the all American true blue family- we weep and we wipe all behind a wooden carcass we call a home. They’re always seemingly perfect behind that façade created by the media. But we all know the stark nude reality of the situation don’t we? Jenny Jones. Doctor Phil. Sally. Jerry Springer ..and yeah Oprah too. To name a few. :-p
In expansion… Lemme itemize the yan/gist into varying scenarios-
GF'S BF'S- it can’t work no matter how hard you try and want that person for you you yourself and you (what’s d name of that basic metaphysical greed again? Beats me! Its in a league of its own) it just CANT work! You'd always end up tripping on yaselves (and BOY would them falls give you more to worry about than frequent trips to the dentist). Let’s say you do kick it off…. How long until d binding force-field loses its clasp…. Then a simple thing as a missed call causes a raucous that would last for days… Mr Ego’s the umpire Sir Arrogance the manager… we all know what that translates to.
Statements like – “he/she/it was never my type, we never meant to be, she/he suddenly changed, the relationship died a natural death…" CMON!!!??
I always believe that its curiosity that causes our wahala… we always wonder what or how this person differs from the other….
But that’s a thing we cant help can we? All we can do is hold a pen one hand and a pad on the other, draw squares with words by their sides all the way down the page- checklist (aka compatibility checklist :p)
Just pray… and pray… and pray… And LIVE. (works wonders trust me!)
FRIENDS- One of my fav topics. Just last night I had a tête-à-tête with a GooD friend about a mutual person of interest the english dictionary might in its abrupt haste call a friend, and how he/she/it has always been there for temporal and immediate gains/benefits. Always plotting, always cunning, and “thinking” that somehow somewhat he/she/it is smarter or has some sorta hold on me/us... *laughs*
For instance… A simple gesture of a call from such a person is calculated!
If its to last 5mins then, 3.5mins goes to slimly, ‘smeagolly’ and “snakily” (not sleek, I know) tryin to fill d void, that’s ever increasing, with chit chat and hypocritical concerns on ya status quo, if not, then it'll definitely be about ‘issues’- bf,gf's if any at d mo and y not. Chit chat chit chat gulma son jin zance etc. (not that I bow/conform with em or anything :-p…… well… occasionally I do. SO?!! :-| ).
Then comes the ill-waited 1.5mins, which, mind you I’ve been looking forward to (cuz obviously i've been long nauseated by all that hypocrisy of intimacy, constancy, fidelity and loyalty… SHEEESSSHHHH!!)
“I need you to...”
“Do you by any chance...”
“Pls send me ____'s number”
“Could you please….”
“There is this….”
“Don Allah….” *smdh*
A friend compliments your every effort to the bond you are continuously developing be it financial, spiritual, moral, ‘amoral’ (jokes or not), and all the tits and bits of the social infrastructure we’ve built around us and with the so-called ‘friendship’ in the centre.
This quote says a lot about compatibility in friendship-
“Never explain: your friends don't need it and your enemies won't believe it.”
“Two may talk together under the same roof for many years, yet never really meet; and two others at first speech are old friends.”
SIBLINGS- don’t know about other parts of the spatial and somewhat juxtaposed masses of land we fondly call earth, but here, where polygamy, divorces, and co are a norm, you'd find one person having more than 1,2,3-10 siblings from different mothers, fathers etc. Of which, definitely, there are those who are more in tune or akin with your being, personality, and needs (no matter how obtuse or acute they are! LOL).
Others are just the plain ol “YAN UBA’s” lollllz!
Don’t go reading between the lines… I’m more than good with my siblings. DON’T be fooled! They are missing moi as we speak/read/write.
POINT- you could come from the same scrotal sac, be incubated and nurtured from the same womb yet without compatibility… you's nothing but semi-identical gene pairs with a lil of mommy and daddy in each ya.
Compatibility people. Compatibility.
PARENTS- you didn't think I was gonna leave this out did ya :-). Don’t worry mine aren't on Facebook. Lol
I need say little about them, for two reasons.
One- you've already seen how i'm holding the map and where ma compass at.
Two- I’m gonna write a piece about em later on (fingers crossed?) [already wrote it actually]
But this I can say though, they're a unique pair yet you find yourself loving one more than the other.
It’s not a crime or a sin that’s for sure.
What is it I hear in the air?
"Ccc… Ccom... Ccomp.....!"
One gets you WELL, the other…. Wellll let just say… he/she expects more from u… but the love is there.
CO-WORKERS/NEIGHBOURS/COURSEMATES/ROOMMATES ETC- well from now they're at your mercy cuz i haven't had the much needed depth to explore, or better yet, to paint a piece on them.(with the exception of no.3 & 4 of course.)
“A bad neighbor is as great a misfortune as a good one is a great blessing.”
~Hesiod~ (Greek poet 8th century BC)
Of course yall did notice I’ve left out d spouse section clean... That... Doesn't need a tip-tap on ma keyboard now does it!?
“It's good, you know, when you got a woman who is a friend of your mind.”
On a parting note…
The only instance where opposites attract is in the field of magnetism electro and otherwise, which need I remind you, is under study….of blab la bla INANIMATE carbon blah blah blah. Not that jaded cliche we've fed for ages.
REALITY- The only instance in the real world where opposites attract is with inanimate objects which abide by one law of physics or the other be it Langevin’s, Faraday’s, some French guy, a Danish one, etc.
With the living…It’s a different ball game!
“Opposites may attract, due to one fluke or the other, but it’s the like-minded that LAST!”
~I A Saeed~
© I.A.Saeed 2011